Tuesday, August 7, 2012

Your Super Chic, Jet Setting, Zero-Responsibilities Pen Pal.

Hello, and welcome to my… well… thing. “blog” sounds way too, what’s the word I’m looking for… super lame. This isn’t 2004. Basically, I’m going abroad to Italy for approximately 5 months, and, along with the rest of my generation, I feel the need to publish everything about my life. Rather than write about my adventures in a diary, like some sort of archaic Laura Ingles Wilder, I’ve decided that the world needs to be kept in the loop with all my adventures. So here we are… thank you internet.
Let’s back up a second… when I said world, I was speaking metaphorically. I’ve posted the link to this “blog” (note to self: come up with a better name for that) on Facebook, tweeted it, and sent it along to friends, family friends, and, of course, my entire extended family. Optimistically, I’m looking at maybe two people who will regularly (using the word loosely here) keep up with this thing: mom and dad (shout out to Nora and Tim, best parents ever. They’re better than yours.) I’m not trying to get pity here, just trying to be honest. If my friend/family member/etc sent me a link to their blog I’d be all “that’s rad! A blog?? Wow. I’ll totally read it every day because Europe sounds like it will be so interesting!” In reality, I’d forget about said link, and even if I clicked on it, as soon as I saw more than a couple sentences, I’d bail. But, if you are one of the brave souls who plans to keep up with me, or even intermittently tune in, there are some things you should know:
1.     I love grammar. It’s the best WHEN USED PROPERLY. I am a linguistics minor (google it, I won’t explain it again). That said, I am a flawed human… (gasp) I have been known to misspell things, write in run-on or fragmented sentences, misuse punctuation, and even use improper grammar. A lot of times this is for effect, but sometimes it’s just because I’m tired, lazy, or just plain dumb. Bear with me people.
2.     I typically get creative at odd hours. This will typically mean between the hours of 11pm and 3am which actually shouldn’t matter because you guys are probably all in America and I definitely heard something about a time difference… hopefully that means we won’t have an issue.
3.     I think I’m funny. The operative word here is “I”. I crack myself up. However, you might not feel the same way, and if you don’t, then there is something seriously wrong with you and you should be blocked from this blog thing pretty much right now. That said, I’ll admit that sometimes I’m off my game. On those rare occasions, I deeply apologize for wasting your time.
4.     I have been known to occasionally repeat myself.
5.     I am often redundant.
6.     I see this blog (temporary term) as a diary of sorts… I plan to chronicle my super cool European adventures here so when I’m old and depressed zonked out on medication rotting away in the nursing home my good-for-nothing kids dumped me in, I’ll have something to look back on. However, I do understand that there are others who are not 86-year-old me who will be tuning in. It is because of you guys that I will be trying to include content that will be educational, or at the very least, entertaining.
Itinerary:
August 10, 2012: Departure for Rome, Italy
August 11, 2012: Departure from Rome to Dubrovnik, Croatia.
August 19, 2012: Return to Rome, Italy
August 22, 2012: Family ditches me for America.
August 22-September 15, 2012: Tentative Italian activities
September 16, 2012: Arrival in Florence
September 17-December 20, 2012: I’ll let you know as soon as I figure it out. 

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